The Pain In Mother’s Day

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Held by Natalie Grant

To all those people who deal with the pain of Mother’s day remember Jesus is holding you in his arms and he has held you since the day you were born. Jesus understands.

As I sit here this morning trying to find the words to begin this is difficult. I dread Mother’s Day. I will be honest I hate it. I don’t like it. One day on the Calendar I wish I could just bypass. Don’t get me wrong I am thankful for both of my mother’s. My birth mother and my adoptive mother.

The pain in mother’s day for me is never being able to have children.  After several years of trying to have a child we decided to see the infertility specialist. I wasn’t even at the infertility specialist for a full week and then I got the call from the doctor saying I am sorry but I can’t help you. He proceeded to tell me that if I had become pregnant it would have killed me. I was devastated. I could not look at a pregnant woman of even a newborn baby for a year. It was heartbreaking.

I am fine with not having any children, but when mother’s day comes the pain hits hard. It is brutal. I just want that day to hurry up and get over with. I deal with many difficult emotions that day and I stay home from church that day. I am not one that can hide my emotions very well so I don’t go. I want to cry when everyone is saying Happy Mother’s Day. I want to run from it. I have a hard time going to church and seeing all the Mother’s get something and then to have drawings on top of that. It makes me want to just burst out in tears and it makes me sick to see all that go on. I would think that the church in general would be more understanding towards those that are hurting on mother’s day and just get a gift for every woman in the church and leave it at that.  I will say that I am thankful to be in a church where my Pastor understands why I don’t attend church on Mother’s day. It is too painful of a day.

For those that are mother’s I hope I didn’t upset you and I hope that you do have a wonderful mother’s day, but if you know a woman who is going to have a hard time that day let her know that you are thinking about her, praying for her, if you see her sad give her a hug, or get her a card that says I am thinking of you. Little things like this go a long ways.

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Sherry Hensley is a Pro-Life Speaker in Maryland-Conceived in Rape, saved from an illegal abortion. She is married to Fred Hensley. Sherry enjoys inspiring others and sharing her faith. Fred and Sherry attend Bethel Christian Center in Havre de Grace, Maryland.

Who Can Really Love The Reject

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Orphans of God by Avalon

Who can really love the reject?

This afternoon I spent more time reading the book The Primal Wound: Understanding the Adopted Child”, by Nancy Verrier. While reading it the statement who can really love the reject was mentioned and it got my mind going in many different directions.

We have a problem in the world of adoption. The voices of the Birth mothers are heard, the voices of the adoptive parents are heard, but the voices of the adoptee tend to go by the wayside. Should their voices be heard as well? I think so. Because of the separation that takes place from the first mother adoptee’s deal with issues of rejection. I would be lying if I said that I didn’t deal with issues of rejection. I deal with issues of rejection. When things happen to relationships in my world that are hard for me to deal with I look at it as abandonment or rejection and people have to reassure me that they will always be there for me. Not that long ago I had to talk with my Pastor about some things and he told me, Sherry, you’re the one with the voice crying in the wilderness. That made me think.

I am adopted and I was also conceived from rape. Back when I was adopted so much information in the adoption records were fabricated because who really would want to adopt the rapist baby? I mean really who would want to raise the baby who would turn out to be like the rapist. I have news for people in society who think that babies conceived in rape turn out to be like the rapist you are so very wrong. I have yet to understand as to why when a woman is raped and conceives why all of a sudden she is treated like trash and she and her pre-born baby are looked at as rejects. What is wrong with people who automatically say she should have an abortion after rape. Having an abortion after rape only adds to the trauma that she is already going through. Instead of treating the woman and her baby like rejects why not love them and their pre-born baby.

I am thankful to live in a country where I have my freedoms, but those freedoms could be taken away so fast. It breaks my heart that we have many veterans who are homeless and they get treated like rejects as well. Why can’t we find it in our hearts take care of our veterans who fought for our freedoms? We live in a world where rejection is a big problem.

If we took the time to care about the reject this world would be a better place. Take time to love an adoptee who deals with issues of rejection, take time to love a woman who was raped and love her preborn baby don’t reject them, take time to love the homeless person on the street, take time to love the children who are in foster care, and the list of people who deal with rejection goes on.

Let’s look at Jesus. Jesus rejected no one, but yet he was rejected. Isaiah 53:3 says He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were [our] faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.

If no one finds it in their heart to really care about the reject I know someone who really cares about the reject and his name is Jesus. Psalms 27:10 says When my father and my mother forsake me, then the LORD will take me up.

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Sherry Hensley is a Pro-Life Speaker in Maryland-Conceived in Rape, saved from an illegal abortion. She is married to Fred Hensley. Sherry enjoys inspiring others and sharing her faith. Fred and Sherry attend Bethel Christian Center in Havre de Grace, Maryland.

 

I Choose To Forgive

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Forgiveness by Matthew West

I Choose To Forgive

Luke 23:34  Then said Jesus, Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do. And they parted his raiment, and cast lots.

This evening while my husband was working late I decided to watch a Christian film on Pureflix and the title of the film is called Maggies Passage and I did not know what I was in for, but this movie has done something to me. It is a story about a young lady who is adopted into a Christian home and after her father had passed away she felt the need to go and look for her birth mother. She did find her birth mother who was unloving and did not want her. Maggie, destroyed the hotel room that she called home and came to a breaking point in her life. She was able to escape from the hotel room that was destroyed and she found some new friends. A couple of Maggie’s new friends that I remember was Grace who encouraged her to call home and Max who became a father figure to Maggie and fixed airplanes. The part of the film that stuck with me was when Max had to do something and Maggie was washing her hands all of a sudden someone grabbed Maggie and 1 of the two men that were there to take Maggie away was Maggie’s birth father. Max had come back and told the two men that they were not taking Maggie anywhere.

The next thing that I saw was Maggie looking her birth father in the eyes and said, I forgive you. While I never will know who my birth father is when I saw Maggie looking in her birth father’s eyes and telling him I forgive you it was as if I was looking at my birth father in the eyes and saying I forgive you. After I finished watching the film I wanted to find a quote on I forgive you and I could not find one that I was looking for. Then I wanted to find a woman in deep thought and I could not find what I was looking for so I decided to make my own and I wrote a letter to my birth father letting him know I choose to forgive. By me writing the letter tonight I feel a little bit of relief. I still have a ways to go but this is a start.

To my biological father1

When we choose to forgive others God will give us the peace that we need to continue with the healing process. There are times where we have to forgive over and over again. Knowing I was conceived from rape I will most likely have to forgive again. The last few weeks I have been so torn up to where I have been sick physically. Tonight I am beginning the healing process once again.

Sherry Hensley Conceived in Rape

Sherry Hensley is a Pro-Life Speaker in Maryland-Conceived in Rape, saved from an illegal abortion. She is married to Fred Hensley. Sherry enjoys inspiring others and sharing her faith. Fred and Sherry attend Bethel Christian Center in Havre de Grace, Maryland.