Tag: Adoptees

Who Can Really Love The Reject

SherryAnnLeave a comment

Orphans of God by Avalon

Who can really love the reject?

This afternoon I spent more time reading the book The Primal Wound: Understanding the Adopted Child”, by Nancy Verrier. While reading it the statement who can really love the reject was mentioned and it got my mind going in many different directions.

We have a problem in the world of adoption. The voices of the Birth mothers are heard, the voices of the adoptive parents are heard, but the voices of the adoptee tend to go by the wayside. Should their voices be heard as well? I think so. Because of the separation that takes place from the first mother adoptee’s deal with issues of rejection. I would be lying if I said that I didn’t deal with issues of rejection. I deal with issues of rejection. When things happen to relationships in my world that are hard for me to deal with I look at it as abandonment or rejection and people have to reassure me that they will always be there for me. Not that long ago I had to talk with my Pastor about some things and he told me, Sherry, you’re the one with the voice crying in the wilderness. That made me think.

I am adopted and I was also conceived from rape. Back when I was adopted so much information in the adoption records were fabricated because who really would want to adopt the rapist baby? I mean really who would want to raise the baby who would turn out to be like the rapist. I have news for people in society who think that babies conceived in rape turn out to be like the rapist you are so very wrong. I have yet to understand as to why when a woman is raped and conceives why all of a sudden she is treated like trash and she and her pre-born baby are looked at as rejects. What is wrong with people who automatically say she should have an abortion after rape. Having an abortion after rape only adds to the trauma that she is already going through. Instead of treating the woman and her baby like rejects why not love them and their pre-born baby.

I am thankful to live in a country where I have my freedoms, but those freedoms could be taken away so fast. It breaks my heart that we have many veterans who are homeless and they get treated like rejects as well. Why can’t we find it in our hearts take care of our veterans who fought for our freedoms? We live in a world where rejection is a big problem.

If we took the time to care about the reject this world would be a better place. Take time to love an adoptee who deals with issues of rejection, take time to love a woman who was raped and love her preborn baby don’t reject them, take time to love the homeless person on the street, take time to love the children who are in foster care, and the list of people who deal with rejection goes on.

Let’s look at Jesus. Jesus rejected no one, but yet he was rejected. Isaiah 53:3 says He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were [our] faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.

If no one finds it in their heart to really care about the reject I know someone who really cares about the reject and his name is Jesus. Psalms 27:10 says When my father and my mother forsake me, then the LORD will take me up.

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Sherry Hensley is a Pro-Life Speaker in Maryland-Conceived in Rape, saved from an illegal abortion. She is married to Fred Hensley. Sherry enjoys inspiring others and sharing her faith. Fred and Sherry attend Bethel Christian Center in Havre de Grace, Maryland.

 

The Devil Tried To Destroy Me, But God Meant It For Good

SherryAnn3 Comments

There is so much on my mind tonight so please bear with me as I get through this. This is one of the most difficult blogs that I will probably write. When I found out that I was conceived from rape at the time that I found out finding out that I was born out of wedlock was much harder because I was raised to save myself for my future husband. When I read the words born out of wedlock my heart sank to my stomach I was sick.

I have been reading about things that the unborn baby goes through when the mother is going through things, such as stress, anxiety, depression, and other things. The unborn baby senses that. Reading about it has stirred up some very difficult emotions that I have not dealt with until now. The emotions that I am just now dealing are those that come when I first heard the words conceived from rape. I have been torn up for some time about it to where I am sick. The last few weeks I have had things happen. Some crazy person who read one of my blogs left me a note saying kill me, and I had someone report me on Facebook, and most recently while sharing my story someone cussed my birth mother out and I let them have it. I am so torn up by all of this that I can’t even cry. Whenever I hear the word rapist I will start shaking and I get sick.

Going through this is hard because I have the devil telling me that I am the rapist baby, the daughter of a rapist and I know those are nothing but lies right from the pit of hell. I know in my heart that I am not the rapist baby. God created me for a purpose. I am not the daughter of a rapist, but I am a daughter of the King of Kings and Lord of Lords.

My birth mother does not like to be called a hero, but she is. She had an aunt that could have arranged for her to abort me at a planned parenthood clinic, but rather she fought for the life of her baby. She fought for my life.  She did what she could do and she placed me for adoption. When she placed me for adoption her one request was that I be placed in a strong Christian home. God granted her request. Don’t get me wrong I am blessed to have been adopted, but many adoptee’s deal with issues that people who are born into the family do not understand and dealing with those issues can last a lifetime.

While the devil meant evil against me, God meant it for good and I am volunteering at a Crisis Pregnancy Center training to help women in a crisis. When we help the woman we will save the baby.

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Sherry Hensley and her Husband Fred reside in Baltimore, MD. Sherry is a Pro-Life Speaker in Maryland-Conceived in Rape, saved from an illegal abortion. She enjoys inspiring others and sharing her faith.

To be Accepted

SherryAnn1 Comment

Acceptance

 

Waking up this morning I thought about being accepted. With being adopted I can relate with many adoptees that struggle with rejection issues and have a hard time with being accepted. With being adopted myself I struggled with rejection and acceptance issues. Within the first 8 weeks of my life I was in the hospital for a week and my birth mother and I had some bonding time, than I went to foster care for about 6 weeks and then to adoptive home. A lot of people make think because I was a baby and don’t remember that time that it should not have affected me.

The need to feel accepted and to be accepted is something that everyone at sometime or another probably struggle with. Not an easy thing to go through because then you feel alone and that no one cares. What we forget to remember is that Jesus Christ cares for us and he accepts us.

I was looking for some verses this morning on being accepted and there are some that I want to share.

Ephesians 1:6 To the praise of the glory of his grace, wherein he hath made us accepted in the beloved.

1 Peter 5:7 Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.

I am so thankful I have a God who accepts me and cares for me. He sees the sparrow that falls and he sees everything that we do and he cares for us and we are valuable to God.

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Sherry Hensley is a Pro-Life Speaker-Conceived in Rape, saved from an illegal abortion. She is also a blogger for Save the 1. She is married to a minister and loves to inspire others and share her faith.

Re-homing should not be an option

SherryAnnLeave a comment

Just reading articles today to what to give my opinion on I came across an article on Adoption.net about the Republican Lawmaker Justin Harris from Arkansas and his Wife were formally foster parents to 3 sisters. The oldest one was giving them problems so was return to Department of Human Services. The younger two they ended up adopting. Well problems still continued so less than a year later the younger children went to live with a Family friend of the Harris’s.

This breaks my heart because at least one of the younger sisters was raped.  There is much more the story and you can read the full article at www.adoption.net.

Going to give my input. There are a number of Children in the Foster Care system. A lot of them are there because they came from homes where there was abuse, drugs and probably issues like a child that has special needs.

Children in the foster care system are dealing with issues and they need love, care, and compassion just like the rest of us. They actually need more love, more care, more compassion, more kindness, more gentleness.

Adopted Children also need more love, more care, more compassion, more kindness, more gentleness. When a couple adopts a child that child is there’s legally, they have the same rights as biological children, they need to love that child, need to work with that child, and if the child has issues you get the child help.

I am adopted and I am in a few adoptee groups online and I have read the stories. Adoptees can feel like they have been rejected. I would be lying if I said I never went through that. I did feel that way several times in my life. My birth mother took care of me for a week while in the hospital and then I was in foster care for 6 weeks and a couple of days before I went to my adoptive home.

If you are planning on adopting talk with others who have adopted, talk with adoptees, seek Godly counsel and talk with several different agencies before making the final decision.

Adoption is a wonderful thing and I am blessed to be adopted.  I am glad that my parents didn’t go pawning me off to someone else just because I had my moments. They showed me love and worked with me and loved me as their own.

So my opinion when a child is adopted re-homing should not be an option.